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February 26, 2006

When life gives you a lemon...

Laycheese and Gentlecheese, today the Ringoism Guru would like to tell you a story about the origin of the Ringoism’s Lemon Cheese Day, which falls on the 25th of February every year.

Once upon a time, a Chamomile cheese (originally camel-milk cheese, somehow being altered due to Cheesie’s mispronounciation) had two free tickets to Pink Panther and invited Miss Cheesie for a movie date. Even Cheesie didn’t fancy the idea of watching any you-slap-me-then-i-slap-stick” and “wohaha-look-that’s-so-farnie-the-guy-gets-hit-in-the-face-with-a-custard-pie comedy, she decided not to waste two pieces of printed paper that were worth RM20, and secretly prayed that the movie’d better be less crappy than Big Mama’s House 2

So Parmie duly swallowed Camel (I lazy to type Chamomile so camel will do, sorry for that ficklemindedness but I guess it should be notorious enough for you to have known about it already) and regurgitated him in front of Jusco Seremban 2.

Before the movie started, Cheesie had this sudden craving for some munchies.

But the thing is, she’d just had her lunch, and munching on munchies after lunch is against a new rule of her religion. Therefore, the kindhearted Camel was there to help strengthen Cheesie’s will power to resist munchies by tempting her with naming all kinds of cheesy food in the universe.

However, that only made it worse. Cheesie went almost delirious. Every freaking corner of the mall suddenly smelled of food. Even the chopped hair in the saloon smelled edible to her.

Then out of the yellow, the sympathetic Camel said,

“Let’s do it this way. If you can find any food that is made of lemon-cheese, you can have it for your munchies okay.”

“Oh My God, Lemon Cheeeeeese?!?”

Cheesie exclaimed, eyes wide-opened.

As soon as Cheesie mentioned the phrase “lemon cheese”, the whole mall suddenly shone so bright under a yellow halo and smelled like a gigantic piece of melting lemon cheese with a bursting citrus flavor.

Suddenly, a handsome young man who looked like his last name could be Santoro appeared in front of Camel and Cheesie out of no where.

“Who the camel are you?” Camel freaked out.

“I’m God la! Duh.” replied the handsome young man in a snobby tone.

“Don’t bluff wei!” Camel was taken aback in utter disbelief.

“I’m the God of Lemon Cheese. Check this out man, it glows in the dark dude,” said the Santoro lookalike, pointing at the florescent yellow robe he was wearing.

“Uhm.. okay.. but but but…” Camel stumbled suspiciously.

“Wait la haijor don’t la interrupt me,” said the self-professed God, looking slightly annoyed.

He then fumbled around in his pocket and took out a piece of paper. He cleared his throat a bit, turned around and looked at Cheesie, and started reading the paper out loud.

“Dear lucky girl. I heard my name called, and guess what, it’s
LEMON CHEESE O’CLOCK!! I now bestow upon you the divine lemon,"
said God, taking out a huge juicy lemon from another pocket and handing it to Cheesie.

"You can use it to ask for any three Lemon cheese items of your
desire and it shall be fulfilled,"
continued God.

Cheesie seemed completely stunned for a minute, then took over the citrus fruit, agape in amazement.

I think the God of Lemon Cheese must have owed Cheesie a super duper big favor in their previous lives (do Gods have many lives? Okay never mind that, I’m sure the God of Lemon Cheese just loves Cheesie to the max).

But you think God really so nice meh? Of course, there’s a catch.

“However, against your three wishes, you will have to fulfill one wish of mine,” God continued.

Overwhelmed by her unbelievable luck, Cheesie nodded frantically while gazing at the shining lemon on her plams in absolute intoxication, seeming oblivious to what God had just said.

“I want Lemon Cheese chocolate!”
requested Cheesie in an eager excitement, almost short of breath.

said God, pointing to Cheesie’s left .

Cheesie turned to her left.

Omilemoncheese it was a whole stack of limited edition Lemon Cheesecake Flavored KitKat !!

Cheesie jumped up and down gleefully and exclaimed,

“I want Lemon Cheese ice cream!”

“Done,” said God, pointing to Cheesie’s right this time.

Cheesie looked to her right.

OMFC it was a whole truckful of La Cremeria’s Lemon Cheesecake Bliss!

Delighted, Cheesie proceeded to making her last wish,

“Hmm... I've got Lemon Cheese choccie, Lemon Cheese ice cream. Hmm...I want Lemon Cheesecake!!”

“Done too,” said God, pointing to the direction behind Cheesie.

Cheesie turned around and saw a big banner.

Holy Lemon!

Cheesie was so overwhelmed she almost shed tears in joy.

“Now it’s my turn to make my wish,” said God.

Cheesie freaked out. Being a typical Aries, She always did things on an impulse without thinking twice about the possible consequences. Now she kinda regretted agreeing to God’s offer.

"Shit la this time, what if he wants me to give him a BJ?" Cheesie thought to herself, worried.

“What… what do you want?!” asked Cheesie, sweating profusely.

God then whispered into Cheesie’s ear.

Cheesie listened and nodded accordingly, looking slightly more relieved.

“Now, go enjoy your lemon cheese, my child,” God smiled at Cheesie, then vanished into lemon air.

There, lucky Cheesie picked her first treat and shared it with Camel.

Lucky Cheesie had her cheesecake and ate it too!!

This is, VERY the CHEESY

This is, DOUBLE the CHEESY


Working on the formula

After done dancing around in an arabic camel costume and spilling some lemon juice (read: lame jokes) (yea, I know it sounds lame, but it should be lame because that’s why it is lame) to Cheesie, the curious Camel asked Cheesie,

“eh, just now what did God say to you?”

Cheesie, with her mouth full of lemon cheesecake, replied,

“Oh, he wanted me to make the 25th of Feb every year the Day of Lemon Cheese to commemorate this meaningful day lor.”

“That’s all?!”

Camel almost fell off his chair.

“Got summore wan. He asked me to blog about him la.”

“-_- …… ”

“Oh ya. He also said I must refer him as a handsome
Santoro-lookalike wor."


And that was the origin of Ringoism’s Lemon Cheese Day.

Thank you for reading.

Lesson of the day:
When life gives you a lemon, what do you do?
Why, make some lemon cheese of course!! =D

9 people cheesed:

  • At 2/27/2006 12:58:00 AM, Blogger Malenki said…

    I totally thought you photoshopped the Kit Kat Lemon Cheese thingy untill i googled it and found the jap version at J ...


  • At 2/27/2006 01:54:00 AM, Blogger First Aid said…

    Is that God's name Keith?

  • At 2/27/2006 05:21:00 PM, Blogger cheesie said…

    you think my PS skill is that good??


    *borrows camel's arabic camel costume and dances around*

  • At 2/28/2006 10:35:00 AM, Blogger Timothy said…

    The many different types of cheeses available mean there is something to suit every taste. It is generally believed that cheese was first made in the Middle East. Legend has it that a nomadic Arab made cheese by accident when a saddlebag filled with milk fermented due to the hot sun and the galloping movement of his horse.

    The Roman Legion helped spread the art of cheese making throughout Europe and England. some cheeses are still made by hand using old-fashioned techniques. When you buy cheese online, it is possible to deal directly with the people who make the cheese.

    Cheese can be made from the milk of cows, goats, sheep and even buffaloes. The basic principle involved in making natural cheese is to curdle the milk so it forms into curds and whey.

    The curd is then heated and cut, allowing whey to escape. The curd hardens before it is salted, shaped and pressed. Depending on the variety, the cheese will then be aged or ripened for different amounts of time. Bacteria are still growing in the cheese, resulting in flavour.

  • At 3/01/2006 02:20:00 PM, Blogger fish fish said…

    Hello cheesie and other stellars ^_^

    Well, I came to know the stellars from kenny's blog. I don't know you all at all personally, neither do I have any right to judge any of you.

    I just wanna tell you I actually enjoy seeing your girls' fashion and confidence. Compared to a lot of people, you girls have nice figures. I thought I could only see this kind of fashion in Japan (nobody really care at all what you are wearing, as long as you are not naked outside the general bath), kind of surprise to see that in Malaysia too. The lollita costumes are very expensive in Japan, what about in Malaysia?

    Just be yourself, you only have very limited youth to enjoy what you really want. As long as it does not against the regulation. I am just wondering will those guys will be saying the same thing when they are face to face to you girls. LOL

    Take care.

  • At 3/01/2006 02:30:00 PM, Anonymous monyet said…

    hello cheesie, cool blog you have here!! your lemon cheese story tickles me! Never mind what other people say, to me you rock!

  • At 3/01/2006 11:46:00 PM, Blogger = l e o n n g = said…

    LOL will still be my word for u, cheesie... hahaha!!

    LOH LLL...!! LOL LOL LOL!!!

  • At 3/02/2006 12:32:00 AM, Anonymous Zanne said…

    After reading your post I feel so hungry. Feel like eating cheese fondue now.

  • At 3/02/2006 12:45:00 AM, Blogger Caine said… utmost respect!!!
    Nice blog..

    and Dammnnn..I'm dying for cheese right now! no seriously!

    "who am I"


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